I remember around four years ago when I first heard about the system of tools that I am teaching today, I was practicing it on my own.
I was dating a few guys at the same time, which I today call SIM or MULTI dating as an abbreviation for simultaneously dating more than one guy at the same time.
One evening I met a new guy who left a great first impression on me. He picked up the great place, we had a lot to talk about and it was a perfect evening.
After our date, he told me to text him if I was interested in continuing dating him. It was a red flag for me and I thought “Why is he asking me this?“.
I didn’t feel totally comfortable with that but I remembered that I learned that if a man asks you to do something then it is not masculine energy and leaning forward. During that time I was really practicing being in my feminine energy and leaning back.
I was feeling a bit nervous and excited that night so I didn’t know what to reply but today I would say “I like when a man contacts me first. What do you think?“.
Anyways, I did contact him the next day with a nice feeling statement message and he replied that he will be happy to see me and that he will plan something and call me.
I know it maybe doesn’t look like a big thing because it was just one date, but it was a big thing for me because I thought he was special and I gave him a much more importance that he actually deserved.
It is all in our head when we make some man special from the start even though it is a way too early to jump into that conclusion because he didn’t support it with action. It is what I call “an imaginary picture about a guy“ which then leads to “an imaginary relationship“ where you got yourself invested in a guy way too early.
So I always advise my ladies to treat all the guys that they are SIM dating EQUALLY. Not making one better or more important than another, and rather staying objective and watching their actions.
Let me go back to the story.
I remember around day six, I was feeling so disappointed and had an urge to text him. I was thinking that he is maybe a kind of a guy who needs a little help from my side to realize that I like him. And I was thinking if I do not text him than some other lady will!
Luckily I promised to myself that I will follow this system and one of the boundaries which I was practicing was not to initiate contact at the beginning of a relationship. My choice was rather getting more active on online dating websites and redirecting my energy towards other guys.
That felt really hard for but I stuck to it!
I remember that night on the sixth day I ended up on a date with one of the other guys I was seeing at the same time and wow, that really helped me forget about this guy but still not totally.
During the next few days, I was really active on online dating profiles and went on a few more dates and that all help me to let go of the man who obviously wasn’t interested enough.
I succeeded to observe his lack of effort as a turn-off rather than a call for a more action from my side.
After that sixth and seventh-day crisis, it was much easier to overcome the urge to text him.
Finally, on the 12th day when I already let go of him energetically, he came back and I received his message where he was explaining how he was ill and had food poisoning and was even at a hospital for a few days.
Only when I stopped obsessing about him and making him too important, was he able to come to me!
This blog is already too long to continue writing what happen next with this man but I will rather choose to share what I gained from this experience:
I hope you learned something from this.
Have you ever experienced obsessing about a man and not receiving his texts and then when you forget about him, here he comes?
Have you ever had a hard time wanting to contact him but knowing that you shouldn’t?
Lots of Love,