I remember around four years ago when I first heard about the system of tools that I am teaching today, I was practicing it on my own.
I was dating a few guys at the same time, which I today call SIM dating as an abbreviation for simultaneously dating more than one guy at the same time.
One evening I met a new guy who left a great first impression on me. He picked up the great place, we had a lot to talk about and it was a perfect evening.
After our date, he told me to text him if I was interested in continuing dating him. It was a red flag for me and I thought “Why is he asking me this?“.
I didn’t feel totally comfortable with that but I remembered that I learned that if a man asks you to do something then it is not masculine energy and leaning forward. During that time I was really practicing being in my feminine energy and leaning back.
I was feeling a bit nervous and excited that night so I didn’t know what to reply but today I would say “I like when a man contacts me first. What do you think?“.
Anyways, I did contact him the next day with a nice feeling statement message and he replied that he will be happy to see me and that he will plan something and call me.
I know it maybe doesn’t look like a big thing because it was just one date, but it was a big thing for me because I thought he was special and I gave him a much more importance that he actually deserved.
It is all in our head when we make some man special from the start even though it is a way too early to jump into that conclusion because he didn’t support it with action. It is what I call “an imaginary picture about a guy“ which then leads to “an imaginary relationship“ where you got yourself invested in a guy way too early.
So I always advise my ladies to treat all the guys that they are SIM dating EQUALLY. Not making one better or more important than another, and rather staying objective and watching their actions.
Let me go back to the story.
I remember around day six, I was feeling so disappointed and had an urge to text him. I was thinking that he is maybe a kind of a guy who needs a little help from my side to realize that I like him. And I was thinking if I do not text him than some other lady will!
Luckily I promised to myself that I will follow this system and one of the boundaries which I was practicing was not to initiate contact at the beginning of a relationship. My choice was rather getting more active on online dating websites and redirecting my energy towards other guys.
That felt really hard for but I stuck to it!
I remember that night on the sixth day I ended up on a date with one of the other guys I was seeing at the same time and wow, that really helped me forget about this guy but still not totally.
During the next few days, I was really active on online dating profiles and went on a few more dates and that all help me to let go of the man who obviously wasn’t interested enough.
I succeeded to observe his lack of effort as a turn-off rather than a call for a more action from my side.
After that sixth and seventh-day crisis, it was much easier to overcome the urge to text him.
Finally, on the 12th day when I already let go of him energetically, he came back and I received his message where he was explaining how he was ill and had food poisoning and was even at a hospital for a few days.
Only when I stopped obsessing about him and making him too important, was he able to come to me!
This blog is already too long to continue writing what happen next with this man but I will rather choose to share what I gained from this experience:
I hope you learned something from this.
Have you ever experienced obsessing about a man and not receiving his texts and then when you forget about him, here he comes?
Have you ever had a hard time wanting to contact him but knowing that you shouldn’t?
Lots of Love,
For more tips and love advice join my private facebook “Love with Ease” group. I can personally support you there and reply to your questions.
Have you ever met a guy who you like and he sends you nice text messages on a regular basis but never asks you out?
You like him very much but time is passing and nothing changes. You feel very frustrated about it.
He is flirting with you and you are surely not in a friend zone but what is he waiting for? Why doesn’t he ask you out?you might be wondering.
Maybe after a long wait, you decided to take initiative and ask him out. He said yes but then canceled at the last moment. Looks like he is really wishy-washy but he keeps sending messages to you.
What does that mean and what to do about it?
Texting can’t replace face to face visits. Many intelligent women nowadays get fooled by this attention and believe that it means something. But sadly, it doesn’t!!!
Texting without meeting and dating is just words, nothing more!
Some men get their fill of feminine energy without ever needing to date you. In some cases, they build a stable texting buddies to boost their ego.
When a man is truly interested in you, he will ask you out and he will want to see you! No matter what that man has to do, he will fit you into his schedule. If a guy really likes you, he will make time for you and make sure he gets in touch with you.
If he likes you, you will know it! You shouldn’t ever be left wondering.
What to do in a situation like this? This man is actually stringing you along and “chatting you up”. He is keeping you as an option if all the other things don’t work out.
Maybe he talks about getting together but never follows up. This is a man who has decided you are not the one for him. It is possible that you feed his ego so he keeps up flirting and texting because it makes him feel good.
If he doesn’t ask to talk on the phone and then meet you within next ten days or maximum of two weeks, you can stop answering his texts and move on! It is simple as that! You are investing your precious time in a man who has no plans to date you.
Therefore, it is your job to get out of the situation like this and to weed out guys who are not serious. Those texting things are meaningless!
This is one of the boundaries you can set for yourself and refuse any guy who is not acting in accordance with it.
For example, I had my boundary set that I stop responding to a man who hasn’t asked me out in a three weeks period.
Set your own boundaries in advance and stick to them!
Having boundaries helps us in valuing ourselves and in maintaining our confidence high. Every man that meets you will know that you are a woman who values and respects herself and holds herself in high regard. He will be able to feel it in your vibe.
That will make you even more attractive. Having boundaries will help you to let go of the people who don’t do what they are supposed to so you can make free space for the ones who will give you all that you need.
Don’t accept crumbs when you deserve the whole cake! We accept the love we think we deserve. You deserve the best! You deserve a man who will want to spend time with you and who will not keep you waiting and wondering. You deserve a man to whom you will be a priority and not just a texting buddy.
Hence, if you notice that a guy is wishy-washy, just move on!
You deserve better than that! Don’t make excuses for him and don’t waste more of your precious time.
If he wanted to ask you out, he would!
P.S. If you want to get more love advice from me and connect with other ladies who are also learning the new things about dating and relationships, join us in private Facebook group “Love With Ease”.
Everything you post there is highly confidential.
I would love to get to know you and connect with you more in my facebook group.
Lots of love,