Have you ever experienced situations in which you were not happy with your man’s behavior but were tolerating it without saying a word?
You were too afraid that you will scare him if you say something? So you rather stuffed it down?
What do I mean by man’s bad behavior?
I am talking about small things in a relationship that don’t make us women feel good. The lack of respect and caring. Unconsiderable, too selfish or ignorant behavior.
Maybe even toxic behavior where he says some nasty words to you which I hope is not the case.
For example, a man asks you often to drive to him even though he can drive to you.
Or maybe sometimes when you two are messaging it takes hours before he replies. You know that he could reply before if he wanted and that is bothering you. Yet still, you don’t say anything.
A man who asks you out on a date and then keeps canceling at the last minute.
A man who talks about his ex on the first date and you really don’t want to hear about it.
A man who never says that he is sorry and so on.
There are endless examples of this.
When we are tolerating a bad behavior, it is like we are saying to a man that it is okay to treat us like that.
At the beginning of the relationship, men will test you to see how much you can put up with.
A woman who knows her value and her high worth does not tolerate! She either accepts or rejects.
That is the kind of woman I want you, dear reader, to become! A Goddess type a woman. A Diva kind of woman!
A woman who knows what she wants and what she feels and who is strong from the inside.
It is very important, even when you aren’t happy with some behavior, to express yourself in a soft and a feminine way. That means by using feeling statements and without attacking or controlling a man.
I know you can do this! Ask yourself in your current relationship, are you tolerating something?
Women don’t want to be selfish or mean. They want to be nice and kind in all situation and avoid the conflict.
That is the main reason they sometimes don’t feel brave enough to share how they truly feel.
They want to be liked by a man. They feel very scared he will get mad or leave them.
They feel so afraid to lose a man that they rather ignore things that need to be addressed the same moment they happened.
Never be afraid to loose a man because you were intolerant to bad behavior. When we ignore the small things, they grow!
If you don’t express your truth and repress it. hiding it and sit on it, those emotions will start to control you. You will be less and less happy during the time.
Very soon your emotions will start to control you to the extent that you will start to act out of it.
You should never act out of emotions because that will only make things worse.
There is a huge difference between expressing emotions in a feminine way and acting out of it.
Acting out of emotions means being totally controlled by them.
If you read my other blogs, I write a lot about how to express yourself in a way that a man can hear and understand. In a way which is not controlling and without attacking him or making him wrong.
During the process of dating, you will meet many men who will vanish or will not be a good match.
Every time you will stand for yourself and speak your truth, you will feel more and more powerful. With every “no” you say to a man, you will feel as you are sticking by your highest value. You will be so proud of yourself and you will respect and love yourself even more.
As a result of all that, you will attract a better quality man.
The truth is that men actually lose attraction for a woman who does everything they want. A woman who puts up with everything and is okay with whatever he does.
If you tolerate this kind of little things and try to please him by all means, it will actually push him away. He will realize that you actually don’t value yourself much! You are putting him first instead of putting yourself first.
Always feel free to say ” This is not working for me”, or “I don’t want to do this”, or “This doesn’t feel good”, or “I don’t feel comfortable with men who are late on dates” and so on.
Every time when you will stay grounded and firm in your values and standards, you will feel great and strong.
Start by observing what you really feel and what you really want in any particular situation. When you feel triggered you need to slow down and really investigate yourself and become a detective of yourself. Notice what is really happening with you at a particular moment. Discover what you truly feel and what you truly want and express in a way previously described.
As a result of this, you will succeed to love and value yourself even more. You will radiate confidence, strength, and high self-respect.
You will attract a man who will want to love you and value you in the same amount that you love and value yourself.
I wish you success in achieving this and to always be awake to catch when something doesn’t feel good and to be able to express it in a peaceful, feminine, free and untriggered way without acting out of feelings.
P.S. If you want to get more love advice from me and connect with other ladies who are also learning some new things about dating and relationships, join us in private Facebook group “Love With Ease”.
Everything you post there is highly confidential.
Here is the link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/277358435991748
I would love to support you more.
Lots of love,
Sometimes us women find ourselves ignoring little things that feel off with a man.
We are making so many excuses for his behavior or even blaming ourselves if something is wrong in our relationship.
Are you tolerating things which deep down inside in your gut you know you shouldn’t be tolerating?
Maybe a man is just not a good match for us but we want it to work out so much that we are ignoring some major red flags.
Let me give you a few examples of the red flags.
You have been dating this guy for a few months but he is comfortable in ignoring you sometimes for days or seeing you just one time in a week or even one time in a few weeks.
Sometimes when that happens, you feel ignored and unimportant. I know how it feels.
And then, as soon as he comes back, you feel so happy that he finally reached out.
Just like that, you quickly forgot how bad you actually felt during those days when he left you with a big question mark above your head.
The truth is that you shouldn’t be left with a big question mark.
You deserve better than that! That kind of behavior should be a huge turn off for you.
If you were present in the moment, you would have realized that being ignored by a man for a few weeks is a red flag.
Maybe you are “putting things under the carpet” and stuffing them down with the hope that things will change when he realizes how great you are. Let me inform you about something.
Let me inform you about something.
When a woman tolerates and allows any kind of disrespectful, inconsiderable or uncaring or even controlling behavior, a man will keep doing it.
“Why?” you may ask and my reply is “Because you are allowing that”.
Because somewhere deep inside you believe you don’t deserve better. We are back again to valuing ourselves and setting the boundaries.
We attract and accept the kind of love we believe we deserve.
If a man you are dating is disappearing regularly and doing whatever he wants, that is a huge red flag which shouldn’t be ignored.
If he can’t fulfill your basic need for a regular contact, imagine then how many other of your needs is he not capable of fulfilling.
Are you putting him on a pedestal while, in reality, he has so little to offer?
Your question may be: Why are we ignoring to see that this particular man actually has so little to offer?
Maybe you are wondering: Why are we ready to wait for so long for him to step up?
As I mentioned before, the most common reason is chemistry that we develop. Chemistry that comes from an unhealed place in us.
Does a relationship with your man bring more stress than joy into your life ?
Does it make you feel nervous and keep you tense? Do you wonder what is going to happen next? Do you feel angry with him?
Or do you sit at home alone and long for him because he gives you so little of his time? Gives you crumbs while you actually deserve a man who is willing to give you the whole cake and not just the crumbs?
All of the things I just mentioned are examples of red flags and they should never be ignored!
If you’re ignoring the red flags, you are wasting your precious time with a man who wasn’t able to make you happy from the beginning.
Maybe you are still not willing to see it and admit it.
It is so much better to notice the red flags as soon as possible.
As time is passing by, it is harder to let go of a man because we feel attached.
Anyways, you will have to do it sooner or later so why not to do it straight away.
Now is the time to see the truth or to start to observe it. Admit yourself what is really going on and act accordingly. If it is not working with some guy, there are plenty of fish in the sea! He is not the only man in the world! Love yourself enough for not to settle for less than great!
Love yourself enough to discard scenarios in which you are not receiving something that you should be receiving. Allow yourself to reject and not be around any man who makes you feel less than great!
The price you need to pay by ignoring the red flags is a lot of your precious time wasted and maybe another heartbreak.
Always be awake and ready to see things as they truly are even if in some cases they are not as you would like them to be!